The feeling of a cold gun
in my mouth.
Hope I don’t stop,
it the wrong way.
Miss my brain,
extend the eternal pain
by shooting my face off instead.
But once the it can be seen, once my nose is shot off and I’m blind without eyes and a jaw. that’s when they say, oh poor thing, she must be in such pain.
And then I want to stop care, they say ok, you should, you should die with dignity so you do not suffer. and I laugh without a mouth and no crinkle to my eye because my death is anything but dignified.